The Tightrope Walk of Ambition

Why too much of it may be hurting the ones you love and not enough of it can lead to a life without impact.

Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

Amelia Earhart was the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.

Nelson Mandela became the first Black president of South Africa and united an entire nation.

John F. Kennedy declared that America would land a man on the moon and Neil Armstrong accomplished it 8 years later.

What do all of these people have in common?

Ambition.

They dared to dream and took action to accomplish their goals. They exemplified resilience and persevered to make an impact. And humanity was all the better for it.

But when can ambition get out of hand?

You’ve likely experienced it firsthand whether it’s that obnoxious, egotistical person at work who’s always vying for their next promotion or that teammate who hogs the ball for their 15 minutes of fame.

You can probably think of a historical figure or two who took their ambition too far with disastrous impact on entire groups of people.

I want to be the very best

James K.A. Smith, professor of philosophy at Calvin College, states that ambition is often marked by domination and attention.

As I reflect on my life thus far, I definitely went through my childhood and early career with an attitude of striving to be the best. Both domination and attention were driving forces.

I used to study late into the night to get the best grades. I wanted my name at the top of the class so everyone would know just how smart I was. I wanted my parents to shower me with praise.

At work I would chase the tough projects and go after more and more certifications. Most of my conversations with my managers were about my path to my next promotion. The increase in salary was secondary to the shiny, new title. As I saw more of my network post ever loftier titles on their LinkedIn profiles, I wanted it that much more.

But is ambition a bad thing?

I don’t necessarily think so. You might be climbing the corporate ladder, starting your own business, improving your health and wellness, or searching for your life partner. Before you can reach whatever your goal is, you need the desire to achieve more.

But if you treat life as a zero-sum game where others have to lose for you to win, you may have gone too far on the ambition spectrum.

Ask yourself:

Are your late nights at the office causing you to miss family events?

Are you physically at your kid’s soccer game but mentally editing that PowerPoint deck you’ll be presenting to your senior leadership team the next morning?

Is your constant calorie tracking and your 4-day full-body weight lifting split creating a rift between you and your partner?

It may be time for you to reassess your goals.

Don’t believe the lies

I know it can be hard in today’s hustle and “grindset” culture. We’re forced to believe that we always need to be “making moves” and staying 5 steps ahead of everyone else.

We lie to ourselves and say we need to do and be more. The world shouts at us that we are not enough.

If you’re tired of maximizing shareholder value or staying within your caloric limits and hitting your macros, might I suggest the following?

1. Reflect on what you value.

   Promotions, while still important to me, are no longer top of mind. I am more concerned with my Faith (connection to God), my relationship with my Family, and being in Community with others.

   That’s what’s important to me. How about you?

2. See what needs to change in your life.

   I’m not asking you to quit your job (in this economy?) but perhaps pumping the brakes a bit is called for. You might just need to stop saying yes to everything that comes your way to focus on the truly essential stuff.

3. Do something about it.

   Ambition is just that. It’s a desire. To get to where you’re trying to go, you need to take action.

So what’s the thing in your heart that you’ve been putting off? Or is there something you must stop doing? Is today the day you look at yourself in the mirror and make that change?

Riddle Me This

Maybe you’re content with your life today. If that’s you, I think that’s pretty awesome. Keep on keepin’ on.

But if you’re reading this and you’re thinking to yourself, “I’ve got no ambition. What should I do?”, you might need new goals.

“But I don’t know what my goals are or what I want to do.”

The quality of your life is a direct reflection of the quality of questions you are asking yourself.

— Tony Robbins

Ok, so I’m probably using Tony’s quote out of context, but it’s helpful here.

Let me give you an example. Let’s say that part of your daily commute to work consists of a pretty dangerous walk. The sidewalks are crumbling and there aren’t any traffic lights on the part of the highway you need to cross to get to your bus or train.

You might think to yourself, “I like my job but this commute sucks. Should I quit?”

The better question might be, “There’s plenty of other people with this same walk. What can I do to improve this for all of us?”

This could lead you to making a trip to your city hall, getting involved with your community, and making your town a safer place to walk around.

Presto! You’ve got yourself a new goal that you’re passionate about.

A question that’s been on my heart for a few months now is, “In a world that’s more connected than ever, why do I feel so alone?”

This has led me on a journey to find real life connection. You could say I’m ambitious about my new goal of getting back to a feeling of community that I had before the 2020 contagion.

And that’s an ambition where everyone wins.

Take some time to self-reflect on what’s in your heart, ask yourself the deep questions, and use your ambition for a force of good.